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April 24, 2009


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I woke up this morning completely numb.  I know this is a scary place to be in life, to not care anymore.  To feel like nothing makes a difference.  The fight has worn me out.

I left 30 minutes early this morning so I could sit in the gazebo at the park where I read my Bible and whispered a few prayers.  I closed my eyes to pray and the world started spinning as if I was going to pass out.  I squeezed my eyes so tight they hurt but I forged through.  I had things to say.  Pleas to dash to the Heavens asking for guidance, strength, courage.  

I feel like I’ve been given a gift to breath in the calm when it’s there and to recognize that the calm always means there will be a storm.  I can only pray that I survive this one.

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